By Kieran Davey
Dating is and always will be a fun experience, no matter what your age. There is that magnificent feeling of excitement and sheer joy when you meet a person you share a bond and have similar interests with. A feeling that 'money' will never buy.
First things first. Forget the '3 laws' or any other 'laws' you may have in your head right now. Let's start with you. Clear your mind. This is exactly what you must have and need when you approach Dating from the start. This being - 'The Power of the Open Mind.'
Finding your life partner is almost impossible without this mindset. Give yourself the best possible chance from the start. A negative mindset from the start will only hinder you. This might seem like advice at it's most 'basic.' It is not. You'd be surprised how many people ruin their chances by having a 'closed mind' before the date has even begun.
Better still, dating is great for you as a person with this mindset. You are put into another zone. Whether it be in or out of your 'comfort zone.' This can often help you unravel more of your true self. The side of yourself that you are less familiar with.
OK then. So we have you in the right mindset. Good. Let's now move on – to these 3 laws.
So you are out on a date. However, what must you do in order to make the date something special? Something to get you excited? Well, that all starts with you and your 'open mind.' No one else can help you with that. It's down to you. However, you can get off to a flying start by following these 3 laws, at the very least! As basic as they seem, you'd be surprised. Time and time again they are forgotten. So, here we go.
Be on Time like a Dime!
Sounds basic doesn't it? However you'd be surprised how many people take this for granted. You might think that 5-10 minutes is fine with a good excuse. However, what will your Date think? Yes, they might be fine with it. Why take the chance though?
Time matters in any place, meeting or activity. The same goes for a date. Even more, if it is the first date, second or even fifth date. That's right, not just the first date. It doesn't matter. Don't let you guard down, even if it's not the 'first date.'
Cliché as it may sound but first impressions count and last. So there you go. You've mad a fantastic first impression. Off to a great start, before even parting words. You have controlled their first impressions with minimal effort. Just by being on time. You didn't even have to dig into your old book of 'late excuses.' Yes, the ones you so often relied on before.
Can you make it last though? You have controlled their first impressions but now you need to move forward. Not too fast though.
Try to be excited and not nervous!
Even more so, if it is a first date. Having your heart pump away is only going to distract you from 'being you.' That is all that matters, as well. Be yourself and give yourself the best possible chance. It is completely normal to feel somewhat nervous but do not allow it to swallow you up. Otherwise, it will stop you from enjoying yourself and the whole 'dating experience.' Isn't that what counts after all? You must have been somewhat excited when you asked your date out? Think about that.
If you cannot stand the feeling, just stop for a moment. Take a deep breath if you want to. Now try and turn your emotion to something that is more positive. It could be absolutely anything. OK, now instead of feeling nervous, try and remind yourself, that you are excited. That's right, excited. Maybe it's even an excited 'nervousness.' This is fine and is to be expected. Maybe your date feels the same way but is not showing it? However, try not to be just plain nervous. Being nervous does not help you or your date out. So your mindset is so important here.
Honesty will always be the best policy
Impressing your date with tall tales might work very well in the beginning. You might even smirk to yourself about some of these tales. However, what about down the track? Yes, that's right. Two, three, four or even 10 dates later. Maybe they will finally probe more and finally ask you to pull one of those rabbits out of your so called hat!
Honesty is and will always win out in the end. Don't kid yourself from the start by kidding them in the beginning. You are deceiving both yourself and them. It will only come back to hurt you in the long run. Kid them now and close the door on any chance of future dates and a relationship in the long run. Be honest with your own self first and then your date second. They will love you for it.
So there you have it. The Dating Mindset you must from the start and 3 Laws you must NOT break. You may even laugh to yourself now. Stop. Yes, of course, these are not the only laws. In fact, there are no hard and fast 'laws' relating to dating. It's a very 'personal' thing. You may break these laws once or even twice and all may be fine. However, it will catch up with you in the end, don't you worry about that.
With all this being said, go in with the wrong mindset and you will no doubt fail. The power of the 'open mind' will always win. That is little doubt. Your own assumptions are one thing but the way you are perceived is another.
Good luck to you all.
Kieran Davey offers Dating & Relationship advice in the unique and Fun Dating Community Velvet Lounge Dating. He does not confess to be an 'expert' and strongly disagrees with people using this 'title tag.' Dating and Relationships are very personal. In fact, it doesn't get any more personal. Velvet Lounge Dating is a Fresh, Fun and Exciting Community like no other. We think you might like us.:-)
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